I'm not sure of your physical stature nor of what variety of axes you have handled but my ax is perhaps 16 (MAYBE 20) ounces in the head with a hickory handle.??Its very light and easy to manage.??Plus I have good aim.??
Different things scare different people which is exactly why I don't like our current setup.??With the exception of (literally) four stations, everyone is set to just jump out and scream a pathetic scream.??Startling maybe, but definitely not scary.
I've put to the owner several ideas I've had which play on actual phobias.??Like digging a hole about three or four feet deep but presenting the illusion that it is much deeper then making acrophobes cross it on a steel I-beam.??Driving agoraphobes into a miss-mesh maze of chainlink fences from which it seems there is no escape.??We already have something for the clautrophobes that works wonders on even those who wander through not being phased by anything.??We have an evil clown for those types as I've mentioned somewhere.
I want there to be a spot where the path opens into a wide clearing and when the group gets to the center they are advanced upon from all sides by zombies!??I want to replace the nylon string guides (or at least some of them) with 1/8 inch steel cable so when we run our machetes across it it sparks!??For people afraid of strangers I want to incorporate them into various places.??Plant an employee in a group as a tag along and have something happen to them or perhaps have them do something to the group.??Or the same thing but the stranger is found somewhere in the woods after his own group ditched him.
There is so much we can do but we aren't.??The formula has worked for over twenty years so they are reluctant to change.??But it could work so much better if we played on more than a few fears.
Between me, the chainsaws, and the "dog house" (a three foot high shelter people have to crawl through for about ten feet and which a guy hits the sides of when people enter and progress through... the thing that gets the claustrophobes and probably some agoraphobes) it's hard to tell who gets the most screams.??But one out of about five groups are those people who just aren't scared of any of this.??They laugh at the chainsaws, lazily look my way when I scream at them, or just advance through the doghouse like its a damn queue at McDonald's. Nothing gets these people and they aren't getting their moneys worth.
We need to provide the illusion that people's lives or well being are in danger.??Tweens in rubber masks going "BLAHGAHA!" does not adequately provide this.??:/
Lizzie Borden's mom and dad received 17 and 19 whacks if I remember correctly, btw.
I don't do vampires (or vampyres) or witchcraft (I do love Dexter, though).??This is only about a job I do for a month out of the year that is slowly grating at me because of the potential it has which is not realized by the proprietor.
I should design my own scare house and find an investor...
Edit - Oh yeah, my favorite idea is to have one station come to life suddenly when a group is in front of it.??Bright strobe lights blind while the heaviest of heavy metal (like Lamb of God, Sepultura, Cannibal Corpse, or Slayer) deafens - both of which cause disorientation.??Then at least four people come running from all sides, at least two have chainsaws, and all are making a racket.??Just from a quiet, serene forest to a bloody amalgam of sensory violence.??It may not scare people but it will shake them which is perfect for what else is to come further up the path...