RE: Gerik's Non-RO Art Dump (With some RO in it)
He didn't know how it happened. It just... did. There had been no signs, no indication that it was ever going to happen. No one told him to watch out for things, no one warned him of the dangers that he was only bringing upon himself. They left him out there to fend for himself.
And he, blind to everything that he had created, had to suffer for it.
Suddenly, without any warning, the world that he had called comfortable came crashing down in on itself. One tumultuous debacle only spurred on another, and he became more and more aware of the dark abyss that he had begun to create.
A deep, black, void.
Only had he fallen in and realized that it was too late, did he come to the epiphany that it was all his fault.
The first big thing he noticed slipping away, was the thing that he once called family. They began to distance themselves from him, and from each other. The home that he lived in no longer became a home, but a house.
Everyone lived their own lives. They only came together to eat-- and even then, it was in silence, without any interaction. Like they were all being forced to eat at that table, and no one wanted to be around the other.
When the day was over, they would go back to their own separate beds. Even the beds that his parents had was separate. Everything was detached, and the togetherness of that family no longer existed. This one, he had known was coming for a while. Ever since he had told them his deepest, darkest secret, he realized that they were already so far down that path. While he had hoped they would be able to band together and help him with coping, instead all that happened was that every member dealt with it in their own way, and left him to deal with it in his.
It didn't help that he shut them out, but by that point any chance of togetherness was long gone.
The next was his failure at the one thing he told himself he existed for.
"I want to belong to one other."
A simple thought, a simple vow-- but no more now, than a simple dream. A reality that he would never attain, because his idea of belonging was too much for most to handle, comprehend, or work towards. Was it his fault, or theirs? Was he asking too much, or too little? Was he trying too hard, or not trying enough?
Needless to say, the late night phone calls, the feelings that he kept bottled inside, the inability to cope-- none of this amounted to any good. He lied through his teeth saying that he was okay to anyone that cared about him; even worse, he lied to himself in "putting on a happy face", and continuing on with his life.
It wasn't like life was bad. He was moving up slowly in the world, and things were getting back on track. Or so it seemed.
Before he knew it, chance after chance slipped through his fingers, and doors began to close. Instead of moving up, he was just moving forward-- taking things as they came, and no longer trying to look around at what else might be.
This world that he had grown so adjusted to was not the world that was around him, but simply the reality he had chosen.
And when that reality was destroyed, everything was gone.
The only thing left around, and inside of him was...
Well, nothing.
A deep, black, void.
Gerik - Some noob Battle High Priest
Shichiro - Some noob AD
Muarim - Some noob smith
I'm just a noob.
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