101 things to do if the net and/or heRO go down.??You should be taking notes.??There
will be a quiz.
- Guitar
- Ukulele
- Violin
- Walking
- Driving
- Playing that $4,000 guitar I'll never afford at the music shop up the street
- Reading
- Researching
- Working
- Red Dead Redemption
- Swimming
- Cleaning
- Bathing
- Sleeping
- Fixing my car
- Listening to music
- Image editing
- Facebooking
- Solving arbitrary math puzzles (like, how long does it take a fly to complete a single circuit in my room if he follows a perfect circle at five miles per hour and my room is 14 feet square???Bonus points: how many itty bitty fly body lengths is that?)
- Pretending to be psychic
- Climbing Mount Everest
- Partaking in carnal relations
- Inventing something
- Reinventing something
- Using the euphemism
- Inventing new euphemisms
- Flash mobs
- Planking
- Making someones day
- Ruining someones day
- Saving someones life
- Skydiving
- Scuba diving
- Cliff diving
- Ice diving
- Treasure hunting
- Swashbuckling
- Flying
- Falling
- Falling with style
- Making a baby
- Having a baby
- Feeding a baby
- Changing a baby's diaper
- Waking up at 3am after falling asleep at 2:30am for the fifth time tonight because you're trying to introduce baby to falling asleep in baby's crib instead of mommy and daddy's bed because baby is really starting to try mommy and daddy's marriage
- Getting drunk
- Impersonating Mel Gibson
- Pretending to be crazy
- Pretending to be Tom Cruise
- Watching a movie
- Watching a good movie
- Silently weeping in the corner balled up in the fetal position
- Rocking back and forth clutching your head muttering something about aliens and voices
- Picking flowers
- Re-envisioning D-Day
- Running for mayor
- Running for governor
- Running for Senate
- Running for Congress
- Running for president
- Running from the law
- Running for fun
- Running of the bulls
- Protesting
- Boycotting
- Screen-printing
- Painting
- Writing your memoirs
- Meditating
- Revising your last will and testament
- Volunteering
- Riding roller coasters
- Riding emotional roller coasters
- Skeet shooting
- Juggling
- Solving a Rubik's cube
- Solving two Rubik's cubes
- Defragging your hard drive
- Reading a dictionary
- Reading a thesaurus
- MacGyvering a space shuttle in aspiration of being the first human on Mars
- Writing a letter to Henry Winkler thanking him for the Fonz
- Learning a foreign language
- Learning a domestic language
- Going to the museum
- Antiquing
- People-watching
- Super-gluing quarters to the floor of high-foot-traffic areas
- Stalking arbitrary people and, when they accuse you of stalking them, accuse them of stalking you from in front.??Cheeky bastards.??Saw 'em in the mirror the entire time.??Why else would they have followed you here?
- Hotdog-eating contest
- Ugliest dog contest
- Ugliest sibling contest
- Ugliest baby contest (Regional champion.??Seven years in a row.??I'm not bragging.??Just proud of my accomplishments.)
- Writing your senator asking why something that benefits no one yet hurts so many people is illegal in this fine state.??I thought this was America?!
- Knitting a sweater for your grandmother
- Entering a childrens' competition - or full-day event.
- Organizing everything in your life by one parameter (e.g., alphabetically, chronologically, chromatically, by importance, by fondness of memories invoked, by which gives rise to homicidal tendencies more)
- Reading walls of text instead of being so lazy that not only did you not read it, but you're too lazy to even completely type out "This was too long.??Ergo, I didn't read it.??...Here is what I think anyway."
- Piano
- Writing your opus
- Enjoying the moment
There are a million things to be doing when the net and/or heRO are down.??People have existed for millennia before the advent of the internet or Ragnarok Online.??You just need some imagination.??Or friends.??